Crazies are out in force.

So the high school got a shooting threat today. The high school will be on lock down all day tomorrow. There will be police paroling the grounds at the elementary that my children attend. I am assuming they will be at the other elementary and the middle as well. My middle schooler does not care if he goes to the whole 15 minutes they have school tomorrow so he will be staying home. My two elementary age boys will be attending their parties....but my husband and I are going with them. That way they can go and enjoy their selves and we can be there to keep them safe. The world has gone crazy.

frustrated

I want my gun! I am about to go park myself in the gun store and throw a first class screaming temper tantrum. Ok, not really. But patience has never been a strong point with me and to make it worse, one of my friends walked right in yesterday and walked out with the gun she wanted. ARGHHH! Yeah, I have jealousy issues too. Sigh.

Not much going on here in Gracieland. Although my little foster puppies did try to take on a herd of deer this morning. The pups sounded like a herd of coyotes and that really confused the deer. They stood on one side of the fence, leaning over it to see what these weird sounding little furballs were. The pups would run up to them with their tails high and their scruffs up yipping and yapping, then whip around and run back to the porch with tails between their legs. They were pretty convinced they had run those deer out of the yard when they finally got bored and wandered up the hill. Pretty proud of themselves right about now.

I have been given the title of cubmaster for our little cub scout troop. I am having a hard time adjusting to not having a den of little boys to teach every week, but there is usually someone that needs help so I don't get too bored. Last night though, one of my boys (of course it was Crash, who else would it be?) decided to make things a little bit more interesting. He stuck his tongue (the whole thing) to a metal pole and couldn't get it off. His brother was yelling to him to spit on it, I was trying to get to him to pour my bottle of Pepsi over it, but he panicked and ripped it loose. Leaving behind a fair amount of tissue. He's eating soft bland foods for a while. I doubt he will try that again. At least not until next year.

He got in trouble for WHAT!?

So after a long crazy day involving a (mock) disaster complete with helicopters, ambulances and fire trucks, and a rogue mountain lion (for real), I went to pick my sons up from school. I was also picking up a neighbor kid because his mother didn't want him walking home with a mountain lion on the loose. I went into the office at school to inform them about the cat so they could inform the bus drivers when I saw a pair of feet that looked.....familiar. I leaned around the parent in front of me and was met with the sheepish grin of my middle son.

Me: "What the heck are you doing in here?"

Crash: "I got into trouble."

Me: "AGAIN?"

Crash: nods

I had to go find the neighbor kid before he got on the bus so I told Crash he was in big trouble and went down the hall to find Spike and the neighbor boy. (He needs a nickname too as he is over all the time).

When I got back to the principles office, Crash and I went in and sat down. Here's where the story gets ridiculous.

The principle proceeds to tell me how my son had formed a gun with his thumb and finger and (gasp!) used it like a gun! His teacher asked him to stop and he did. A few hours later, he did it again this time using the desk for cover. He informed me that Crash had insisted that over the course of a few hours he had forgotten. (So.....?) The principle didn't believe that he could have forgotten in just a few short hours.

I just stared. I didn't know what to say. For one, IT WAS HIS FINGERS! That is almost the first toy a little boy ever comes up with. Seriously!? Two, my son can't remember what he was told to do five minutes ago and he was surprised that he didn't remember after three hours?

I asked if he was disrupting the class and was given the run around and told the same story. How he shot, stopped, forgot and shot again. The principle will call me tomorrow to let me know his punishment. If he gives Crash detention, I swear I am going to go get him. I don't think he should be punished for something all kids do, especially boys, as long as it wasn't disrupting the class. I just think this is stupid. Am I over reacting? I honestly don't think I am but then again, I tend to go Mother Bear when someone is picking on my kids.

Monday.

I have watched CSI, NCIS, Law and Order, Criminal Minds and Unusual Suspects. I can kill you 18 ways and make it look like Alvin and the Chipmunks did it.

I lost my mind... I think my kids took it

WARNING: Due to the recent conditions in behavior in this home, this mom could self-destruct at any moment! Children and husbands approach with caution!

Apparently I have just won the "Meanest Mom Ever" category. Congrats to me.

I am no longer afraid of natural disasters, wild animals, or terrorist attacks...I have sons!

And my personal favorite: Hey, you , yeah , the kid with the smart mouth. Did you know...that the tooth fairy don't leave money for the teeth your mama knocks out?

Today my accomplished the following:

Oldest son nearly broke the middle sons arm.

Middle son throws a tantrum and kicked my trashcan across the room.

Mom got fed up enough to throw the object of the fight across the room and broke it.

Middle son screams that he hates me and that I am the worst mother ever.

Oldest and youngest sons go outside to play with the neighbor kid.

Neighbor kids mom calls to tell me all five boys are on the roof.

Before I can round up all five kids, two have gone home and the other three have scattered.

Middle son comes screaming to (the worst ever) Mom to get the giant sliver pulled from his hand.

Mom sends the kids across the street to work out some energy picking apples.

This was all in about an hour. I am hiding in my room finding quotes that seem to fit my day and make me feel just a tiny bit better. Hope they made you feel better about your Monday.

First day of school!

My sweet Bug and the teenagers started school today. Niece is a junior and may even try to graduate early. She hasn't really decided. Nephew is in 8th grade. Last year of middle school. Some days he seems so much older and others so young but that is often the case with boys his age on the cusp of manhood. Bug is entering 4th grade. She is now in the upper echelon of school. Those years feel sweet and I want her to enjoy and savor them. The picture is her being silly. I am so proud of her and the young lady she is. All of them are pretty great.

Poor Monkey was pretty sad to see all the kids leave today. She wanted to follow Nephew out the door and cried when we dropped Bug off. Being back to hanging out with just me is not her favorite thing. I am a little sad too. They finally seem to get that this is their home and so all of them have been really great lately.

Well here is hoping the year is great and we can have lots of good grades and happy days.

Fiercely independent and completely driving me nuts.

I love my children. I fought very hard to have them, often thinking my health and sanity were going out the window to bring them life. There are almost exactly 7 years between my girls. Fate and infertility made that happen. I wanted only 3 or 4 years between them.

Bug was born when we were pretty young and only 10 1/2 months after our marriage, much sooner than we had planned. Still kids ourselves in a lot of ways but we were thrilled to have her despite how hard my pregnancy was. She was a quiet and mellow baby. She loved to play on the floor with her stuffed toys that my Hubby won in claw machines. She thought everything was an adventure. I drove the 12 hour drive between the PNW and Utah several times with her as a toddler and by myself and she did great. On days I felt horrible, and long before we had a name for why, she would happily sit on my back and watch a movie or play with her toys so I could rest and know she was safe. She hated to get into trouble. She would explore and if she went somewhere she shouldn't all it took was a stern voice and she rarely did it again. She loved to sit in the cart facing me when we shopped so we could chatter. She had to grow with us in some ways, especially her daddy. We were both still figuring out what we wanted from life. He found his career and I found my goals as well. We both mended relationships and went through therapy. We had some rough patches as early marriage can. Bug was my little buddy and my constant companion.

Monkey came along when we had found our feet. Hubby and I both had really beaten back the demons of our youth and were happy in our goals and ideas as a team. She came into stability and with a big sister who adored her. If you see pictures of them at the same ages they look almost identical. It is uncanny. Looks is about the only similarity though. Two girls could not be more different. Bug is a bit of a tom boy and darker. She loves scary movies and stories and never really liked princesses and baby dolls. Monkey is super girly. She wants dresses and ribbons, baby dolls and princess curtains. Where Bug stuck to me like glue Monkey is amazingly independent. All day I hear "Me do it Mama!" She wants to dress herself and wash herself and feed herself. She hates to be still. The only time she is in one place is in the car. Even asleep she wiggles across her bed. We put her into a toddler bed at 18 months and a twin bed at 2 because she moved so much she just didn't have enough room. I have child proofed an area of our house so that I can relax some because otherwise she is everywhere. as it is I still have to watch because she will eat the dog food or try to climb the kitchen table. We had to shave her head a few months ago because she jimmied the baby lock on the cupboard and then covered herself in puzzle glue in 30 seconds flat. That stuff refused to come out of her hair. When we shop she has to walk or help me push the cart. She has to kiss everyone before bed and with the extra family here that can take a while.She is brilliant when she wants to be. She recognizes a few words already on her flash cards and knows how to count to 10. She sings certain songs and loves to play pretend. She also is super caring. She chose to wean on her own. I nursed her until 15 months. She noticed me wince one night as I was nursing her to sleep because her teeth rubbed. After that she refused to nurse even when I offered. She didn't like hurting me. Still if she accidentally hurts anyone she immediately says sorry and kisses it better. Of course if it is something naughty she has to do it any chance she can. I find her trying to climb the gate or onto the table often. She loves to get into the fridge. she thinks spoons and forks are great weapons. She needs the corner and every one in a while a swat on her bottom before she gets that she is doing something dangerous or harmful and she can't keep doing it. I think sometimes her goal is to make me the crazy Walmart lady we all run from. You know the mom. The one with wild hair, screaming as she drags her dirty child through the store like an insane person. I have a lot more sympathy for her now after I pull Monkey from the 5th clothes rack and resort to bribing her into sitting in the cart with candy.

Friday the 13th

Life today has almost been as scarey as the movie!
I got a phone call this morning saying my boys got off the bus and immediatly started fist fighting. Bruiser somehow convinced the principle that he was totally innocent. Not sure how he accomplished that, but he knows better than to try it with me. I got th real story out of him. He was mad at Butch for keeping him in line so he started kicking him. Butch got sick of being kicked so he doubled up a fist and punched his brother in the face. What a day! I hae an appointment with the principal on Monday so Bruiser will be getting detention along with Butch. He isn't going to skip out on punishment when he was just as much at fault.
I have been on the phone all day with various chores and rescue stuff so the house is still a mess. Guess who gets to spend their evening (possibly the whole weekend, hrmmm that has potential!) cleaning? Not Mom! There are a ton of chores to be done, I hope it makes them think twice about losing their temper.

Maggie and Lila have had similar days. I wonder what it would take to just rent an island for a while?

Obama's speech to the children

What do you think? Did your kids watch it? My kids watched it. I wasn't too worried about them being brainwashed in a mere 30 minutes. My kids don't listen to anything anyone has to say anyway! I read some of the speech online and didn't see anything out of line. The basic message was "Stay in school, get good grades and make your dreams come true" Hrmmm, yeah that one is really frightning, isn't it? I talk to my kids about doing well in school on a daily basis. I asked my boys when they got home if they had watched it. Butch and Spike say they didn't see it. Bruiser watched it but couldn't remember what it was about. See, no worries, they pay just as much atttention to a boring presidential speech as we always did when we were kids. No big deal, no brainwashing, nothing out of line at all. I guess I just don't see what all the hubbub was all about.

I can't even find Words.

This makes me sick.

Happiness thy name is Nursery!

So we have all the blinds and fans up and were able to get to Squeaks room. She has been sleeping in her playpen in our room since we moved in and before that in her crib in our room. My MIL had our 3rd room so we needed her with us, plus she was still pretty new. Anyway now she has her own room. I have been nervous about moving her but boy was it wonderful. Last night I put her down in her room at 7:30 and she slept until 12:30, nursed and slept again until 4 when she was ready to come sleep with me. It was bliss. She had been waking every few hours and when Hubs leaves for work super early she was wide awake for that making me have very little sleep. She slept so great. I think she missed her bed. When we put her in it after we had put it together she giggled and wiggled and scooted all over. I am a very happy Mama today!

Feeling a bit down

So the family and I went to Utah to visit our family. Went to Emergency essentials and saw some things you would only find in Utah (blogging about that, probably be up tomorrow). We spent a few days and got horribly sunburned but what is really bothering me is that we left our kids with the grandparents. Seriously, even the dog is depressed. It was a quite drive back home and an even quieter evening. Neither of us had any idea we would feel this way. We were getting excited thinking of all the things we could get done while they were visiting the grandparents, now we are just going ot hurry up and get it all done so we can go back and pick them up!

Friday Funny

Uh, seriously?

There was a huge traffic accident in the area Tuesday. Traffic was backed up 10+ miles for hours. A friend was trying to go to class by taking the main freeway, and it took him 4.5 hours to complete about a 20 mile loop (which only got him about 6 miles on the freeway, and 15 or so back on back roads). I initially heard "drunk driver hit a car carrying two pregnant women" and I was so angry. Turns out, the SUV (an Expedition) was actually carrying 9 people. 1 man, 2 pregnant women and a whole herd of kids. 2 of the kids and one of the women were ejected from the car, because none of them had on seatbelts or were in car seats.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How irresponsible can you be?! I can't imagine not having the Boy in a car seat, and especially NOT in a seatbelt at the least. If you don't have enough room, take two cars. I don't see how this is complicated. I feel terrible for those kids, but those parents should be ashamed of themselves. I hope to goodness Child Protective Services is all over this. Thank God that none of those children were killed.

3 yr old survivor

This 3 yr old boy slipped away from his parents and wandered alone in the forest for 2 days. Searchers didn't think they would find him alive. What a tough little boy. Kids are so resiliant they almost scare me at times. He said he was on his way to see Grandma.

Another Thing to Add to the List of Amazing Crap I Can't Do

These girls are amazing. It's just insane. Watch the whole thing, because you might think you've seen the best, but you probably haven't!

Diapers: What do I do with this sh*t now?

Brad K. made an excellent point on my "Ladies Only" post that got me thinking. A lot of women (and other people) don't think about adding things like feminine hygiene stuff to the preps. What else are we forgetting? In my personal case, the Boy has been a sloooooooooow potty trainer. He is pretty sure I'm batty, and this going on and on about doing things in the toilet is just silly. Why bother when you can go in your pants and Mom cleans you up? Sounds like a pretty sweet deal to me and I'm 25. That being said, the kid is 3. If SHTF, he'll learn really quick.

Now, I'm also quilty has charged for using disposable diapers when the Boy was a baby. Hate me, I don't care. I got lectured up the front and down the back by heaps of people, and yeah, I still don't care. That being said, if I ever so have another baby, I think I'm going to use cloth diapers. I know a few people who've used them and loved them. Their babies had less diaper rash, and potty trained faster as they understood being wet was uncomfortable. Disposable diapers have chemicals that pull the moisture away from the body, and can hold up to 800 times their weight in liquid by converting it into a gel.

Now obviously, if SHTF having a stock pile of disposable diapers isn't very practical. Whereas, cloth diapers will generally last about as long as you can use them. There are a million different types, as is par for the course with handmade type stuff (everyone adapts it to their own needs). A lot of companies now also offer accesories like diaper covers (in various fabrics and designs), reuseable wipes, washable diaper liners, and even training pants.

A few of the girls I know rave about Kushies. Their stuff is adorable, and they have a ton of accesories and was one of the few sites where I found training pants. I love their Classic Diapers but they are very much on the pricey side. A 5 pack of the classics runs about $65 for the baby sized, and about $75 for the toddler sizes. The diaper covers also run about $9. Of course you could also just buy the cover, and use plain old Gerber cloth diapers for underneath.

If your feeling ambitious, you can also give making them yourself a shot. Diaper Jungle has some great resources, and has links to just about anything you'd need. I'm sure if you just google'd a bit you could find a ton more. I can't sew to save my life, so that's a bit out of my realm.

On the Prowl: Kid Friendly Eater Treats

I was recently invited to a friend's families annual Good Friday celebration. This involves a lot of different things, but I'm basically planning to spend an entire day at their home. The Boy will probably be in heaven, he loves playing with other kids so an entire day of playing is going to be surreal for him. Lots of things are planned, including an Easter Egg hunt, so it should be fun.

My dilemma is this: it's a potluck style lunch. Normally this would be easy, I have a bazillion potluck-style ideas, and a bunch more I'd like to try. But this one has to be uber kid-friendly, and Easter themed. I have a feeling I'm going to end up being asked to bring "cookies or something". In case you don't remember, I'm not a baker. I'm not that good at it. Period. I can make basic cookies, but when it's time to impress I'm at a loss.

I asked my sister, the "Baker" of our family and she told me to take pita and hummus. I'm sorry, sister say what? Hummus? This is little kids. I need child-proof finger food, preferably dessert-ish. Where did you get hummus?

My mom was also little to no help. Gracie gave me a couple ideas, and so did Lila but I'm generally drawing a blank. I want to do something more creative then sugar cookies, but still simple as I have to perfect it in one night only.

I'm currently obsessed (No, really) with Cake Pops from Bakerella. The possibilities are endless, and Bakerella made some adorable Easter bunny pops that I might be able to handle if I simplify the faces a bit. I'm very aware of what I can and cannot handle, and teeny tiny bunny faces I'm pretty sure falls into the latter. I've been browsing for the pastel candy corn, and have yet to find it so I think I might have to expand the search area.

I also consider making some meringue cookies like these Easter Story Cookies. Having the boy pound pecans and explain that Jesus was beaten is a little further then I'm willing to travel per say, but meringue cookies are my favorite. We have a mint chocolate version my family makes every year at Christmas, so I'm pretty sure I could hack it.

Other then that, I'm pretty well out of ideas. Anyone have any suggestions?